I would like to share with you some tips about how to approach suffering and struggling – especially if you are a gay man over 40 who is new to emotional anxieties and suffering. If something bad is happening in your life that is causing you to suffer, there is a way to “look” it that will make you feel better. In other words, there is a softer approach to suffering that can make a huge difference for you.
The starting point is to accept your suffering without trying to change it. Acceptance will allow you to concentrate on the actual suffering instead of focusing on trying to stop the suffering. There is a big difference. Most gay men, when they are suffering, they try to stop it by compensation with sex, alcohol and drugs. Sometimes they cover up their suffering with more work – they “stay busy”. Some gay men travel consistently to avoid dealing with the suffering of being single and lonely.