I guess the majority of us have heard about Tantric sex and massage. Had anyone asked me what it was exactly I would have giggled shyly and muttered something about gentle touching, feathers, massage and no orgasm. How wrong I was.

Tantric massage is basically just a massage. However it was created from the belief that if you are sexually happy and relaxed then your health will benefit. The Hindus describe Tantra as achieving personal growth through pleasurable existence. The massage itself does tend to cause orgasms, but these are described as a bonus rather than the aim.

Although Tantric massage does not involve actual penetrative sex, it does involve full on touching of the organs. For this reason you will not find it offered down your local health center. You are far more likely to find it on offer in the many massage parlors in London and other major cities.

If you want to have a go with him indoors here is a pretty basic guide to Tantric massage.

Firstly, from this point on, your manhood is referred to as Lingam (wand of light – don’t be thinking light sabre it’s not that big!).

Choose some gentle music (whale music is optional). Now banish all thoughts of kneading your lover all over until he begs for mercy. It’s not that kind of massage. Make your lover lie on his or her back, legs apart and a cushion under the hips to raise up the Lingam area and a cushion under the head so he can look at their genitals. Explain that although there will not be any penetrative sex this evening you will take them to previously unknown heights of sexual satisfaction.

The massage itself involves every part of the body, although I guess the Lingam area will receive more than its fair share of attention. The massaging of the body is to help prepare the receiver for the attention you will be paying their genitals.

Lingam Massage

Get your man to lay back on the bed with a pillow under his head to enable him to see what you are doing. Put a pillow under his hips and spread his legs with his knees bent. His Lingam must be completely exposed. Begin as before by gently massaging all over his body, avoiding this area for a while. This allows him to become completely relaxed and prepared for the touching of the Lingam. Pour a small amount of oil over his shaft and testicles and begin gently massaging his testicles. Next massage the area on the pubic bone above the Lingam.

Massage the area between his testicles and his anus (perineum). Moving on to the Lingam, gently grasp the base with your right hand and move up the shaft and then remove your hand, repeat with the left hand. Do this for some time, then change to grasping the Lingam at the top, slide down the shaft and remove your hand, replace with the left and repeat this process. The head of the Lingam is very sensitive and deserves special attention. Massage it in a circular motion. Don’t worry if the Lingam goes soft, it will shortly perk up again. Likewise if your partner seems to be on the brink of orgasm, back off and encourage deep breathing.

Keep bringing him close to orgasm and then back off. This is not a method of torture, it helps them to control their ejaculation and therefore achieve longer and more pleasurable orgasms. Whilst continuing to massage his Lingam, you can search for his sacred spot. This is located between his testicles and his anus. It is a small indentation about the size of a pea. If you massage here and gently increase the pressure he may well feel uncomfortable at first. Applying pressure here will help him gain control of his orgasms in future. If he is nearing ejaculation you can apply pressure here and this will increase the intensity of his orgasm.

The end of the massage is signaled by either ejaculation or snoring. If he is snoring you still have some practicing to do. If he has ejaculated, you have some clearing up to do.

I am still very much a beginner however I was pleased to discover that Tantric massage is not a mysterious sexual cult and is certainly not difficult to do. Anyone with an hour to spare and a bottle of strawberry flavored body oil can do it.

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