Sexual compatibility can take away opportunities to make new friends and develop long term relationships. In a world of top and bottom we never get the full package. “Perfect sex” usually comes at the cost of personality mismatch. A new perspective is helpful to make better choices for lovers and friends.
I believe that looking for sexual compatibility has nothing to do with sexual compatibility but it has everything to do with the desire to feel comfortable, validated and accepted. I think that the reason why gay men are looking for sexual compatibility is because they are looking to reduce uncertainty, abandonment and rejection when meeting others. Because sexual connection is the easiest to experience, given the time and effort involved, it kidnaps the process of connecting and gives an illusion of a connection.